Thursday, January 25, 2007

Choice of hell(s)

Sometimes, it is just amazing to know how people can relate real life scenarios in a sarcastic joke.
Below is a depection of joke which I received and I guess the underlying theme is about our (in)efficient civil service.
Enjoy!
Malaysian Hell
A Malaysian dies and goes to hell.
There he finds that there is a different hell for each country.
He goes first to the German hell and asks: "What do they do here?" He is told "First they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the German devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day."
The man does not like the sound of that at all, so he moves on. He checks out the USA hell as well as the Russian hell and many more.
He discovers that they are all more or less the same as the German hell.
Then he comes to the Malaysian hell and finds that there is a very long line of people waiting to get in.
Amazed he asks "What do they do here?" He is told "First they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Then the Malaysian devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day."
"But that is exactly the same as all the other hells - why are there so many people waiting to get in? "
"Because maintenance is so bad that the electric chair does not work, drug addict or besi buruk guy has stolen all the nails from the bed, and the devil is a former Govt servant, so he comes in, signs the register and then goes to the canteen..."

Saturday, January 20, 2007

Why did God make Mothers?

I have been extremely fortunate to have both a loving mom and an equally dotting father all through my life.
I just cannot imagine what life would have been like for me without either one of them. This is not to say that they are perfect - like all fellow humans, they come with certain flaws.
During my growing up years and why - even now, there are still some aspects of them which I loathe so very much.
There were, of course, many occassions during which I prayed to God asking Him to change certain characteristics of my parents so that a particular situation or decision they were about to make, will eventually favour me.
But I must say that, today, as I look back, I'm glad my parents were difficult to deal with when it came to certain issues - yes, maybe at that particular moment in time I would have wished if only something could change them and their decade-old stubborness but then again, it is that very character in them that made them truly special.
Both my mom and dad are stubborn in their very own ways and will not budge from their stand even if the sun fails to rise...but that is them. It is their stubborness that ensured that they never fail to put me and my needs above their own, so that I get to taste the very best that they could afford to give me.
I got the following joke in my mail today and while some of it really made me laugh, towards the end of the mail, I cried softly to myself thanking God for having given me the best mom in the world.
Amma, I know you are not tech savvy at all, let alone to know what blogging is about but nevertheless, this piece is dedicated to you and your endless and unparralled love for me. I love you, amma.
Below are answers given by 2nd grade school children to the following questions:
Why did God make mothers?
1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2. Mostly to clean the house.
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
How did God make mothers?
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me.. He just used bigger parts.
What ingredients are mothers made of?
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
1. We're related.
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
What kind of little girl was your mom?
1. My mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
3. They say she used to be nice.
What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
1. His last name.
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
Why did your mom marry your dad?
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my mom eats a lot.
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
Who's the boss at your house?
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
What's the difference between moms and dads?
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
3. Dads are taller and stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
What does your mom do in her spare time?
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
What would it take to make your mom perfect?
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
If you could change one thing about your Mom, what would it be?
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
2. I'd make my Mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
When you stop laughing, send it on to other mothers, aunts, grandmothers...and anyone else who has anything to do with kids or just needs a good laugh!

Monday, January 15, 2007

Happy Ponggal

For most South Indian Hindus, today is very significant for its Thai Ponggal.

World over, people translate this celebration loosely as 'thanks giving for a bountiful harvest' while some other go deeper into the culture and explain on the significance of the celebration in every Tamilian's life.
For a more detailed read, go to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pongal
Ponggal Valtukal!

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

I've arrived...later than planned

Oh well, you ever notice as often as I do that somethings just don't go as planned no matter how hard you try?
Well, that's precisely the case with me - I wanted to do something symbolic with the New Year and on a personal level, I wanted it to be my move from blogcity to blogspot - I mean my official move.
I wanted to mark my official move with a blog on the first day of the new year but alas, the broadband ISP here (read as Streamyx from TMNET) decided not to function when I most needed it to work.
Forgive me if I'm wrong coz I'm no highly tech savvy blogger, but how come just about every other month or so, even when the hardware and software are working their best, there can't be stable internet connection established?
It takes a lengthy wait to be entertained by the ISP untrained customer service, an even longer time taken to explain the problem to them...all only for them to say something along the lines of 'create a new dial up connection and try again in about 10 minutes or so as I will have to reset some settings for you, ma'am.'
So much for being the pioneer in telecommunications as far as Malaysia is concerned.
Anyway, here's what I originally intended to brag about in relation to my official move to blogspot...

Not that this note is an invitation for a new blog-warming party of some sort, but it is merely meant to broadcast the fact that I've moved my blog activities from blogcity to here.
Why did I move?
I find that tough to answer myself, but if you wish to answer it on my behalf -- which I know some of you will attempt to do -- shoot right ahead via the comments link or e-mail me [if your comments are very damaging to my nothing-to-shout-about profile :-( ]
Am unsure what this move will bring about - but my fundamental personal hope is that, God willing, this move will spur me further to blog my thoughts frequently.
Primarily, my aim of blogging is to literally-speak-my-mind on all matters I wish to talk about...but the reality is harsh, isn't it?
We live in such a fast paced world that talking to one another is so sacred, often reserved for better, more important things in life.
As true, human communication takes a dip for the worse, most of us turn to blogging - maybe not even most, maybe it is just plain old me feeling lonely with no one to talk to about things that I really want to talk about.
On why I cherish talking and subsequently turn to blogging whenever there's no time and place to have a meaningful talk with friends and family is probably the single biggest clue -- reflective of my personal self and what I consider essential in life-- of my blogging adventure.
So now, it goes without saying that whether I blog frequently, get worse than my past blogging performance, write too much or too little, make it personal or keep it as an open book...whatever I do here, is not specifically meant to amuse the mind of the reader.
But if you're amused naturally - for positive or negative reasons, I won't cry foul of course!
However, I appreciate retorts distinctly on the lines of constructive criticism, friendly tounge-in-cheek comments cum good humoured sarcasm and virtual 'bashing' of me, myself & I.
Pheeew...coming to an end, what relieve!
That's some blogging for an intro, don't you think?
Here's a toast to celebrate more blogging and sharing of our respective thoughts on anything and everything...pour your heart out :-)

Thursday, January 04, 2007

Is Santa Chinese?

I suppose I'm one of those who grew up thinking that everything modern, Christmas-linked and Santa Claus most importantly, are things closely related to the US.
Why? Maybe because that's how most children born in the early 80s grew up or were raised - somehow, somewhere, there just was this overemphasised rule that the US is the largest economy in the world and that it is a mighty force.
It still remains largely the same - the US is still a huge economy and much of the world economy does have some bearing on what moves the Wall Street but I guess, things do change and the article below is apt in describing just how much things have changed over the years.
The speed of life's only constant - change - has been so rapid that years down the road, we may actually ask ourselves 'Is Santa Claus from China, too?'
Read it and be enlightened...Merry X'mas and a happy new year!
____________________________________________________________________
Santa Claus is Chinese or, Why China is Rising and the US is Decliningby Lester R. Brown December 18, 2006 http://www.commondreams.org/views06/1218-25.htm
I know Santa Claus is Chinese because each Christmas morning after all the gifts are unwrapped and things settle down I systematically go through thepresents to see where they are made. The results are almost always the same:roughly 70 percent are from China.
After some research, it seems that my one-family survey is representative of the country as a whole. Let’s start with toys. Some 80 percent of the toys sold in the United States—from Barbie dolls to video games—are made in China.
Talking toys that speak English learned the language from Chinese workers. Electronic goods—from Apple’s iPod to Microsoft’s Xbox—are made in China. Clothing—from the latest cashmere sweaters to gym suits—is also likely to have a “Made inChina” label.
The Christmas tree itself may come from China. While real Christmas treesare grown in every state in the United States and are marketed locally, many families now gather around artificial Christmas trees. Eight out of every 10 artificial Christmas trees sold in the United States are made in China. Last year Americans spent over $130 million on plastic Christmas trees from China.
This year Americans will spend over $1 billion on Christmas ornaments from China. And in perhaps the greatest irony of all, even nativity scenes are made in China. Last year Americans spent more than $39 million buying nativity scenes shipped in from the East.
China’s success in attracting foreign investment capital and mobilizing this huge work force has made it the workshop of the world.
That the U.S. Christmas is made in China is a metaphor for a far deeper set of economic issues affecting the United States.
Today Christmas is celebrated in both the United States and China—but for different reasons and with far different economic consequences.
For the Chinese, the manufacturing bonanza means record profits, rising incomes, and, in a society where people save some 40 percent of their income, a sharp jump in savings.
In the United States, Christmas shopping expenditures, headed for another record high this year, contribute to rising credit card debt and a soaring trade deficit. Underneath the American Christmas spirit and good cheer is a debt-laden society that appears to have lost its way, marred in the quicksand of consumerism.
As a society, we seem to have forgotten how to save so we can invest in a better future. Instead of leaving our children a promising economic future, we are bequeathing them the largest debt burden of any generation in history.
At the personal level, credit card debt just keeps climbing, and at the government level, we have the largest deficit in history.
At the international level, we have a trade deficit that moves to a new high month after month.
It’s not the fact that our Christmas is made in China, but rather the mindset that has led to it that is most disturbing. We want to consume no matter what. We want to spend now and let our children pay.
It is this same mindset that introduces tax cuts while waging a costly war. Economic sacrifice is no longer part of our vocabulary. After the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor, President Roosevelt banned the sale of private cars in order to mobilize the manufacturing capacity and engineering skills of the U.S. automobile industry to build tanks and planes.
In contrast, after 9/11, President Bush urged us to go shopping. In the United States we are so intent on consuming that personal savings have virtually disappeared. We have an average of five credit cards for every man, woman, and child.
Of the 145 million cardholders, only 55 million clear their accounts each month. The other 90 million cannot seem to catch up and are paying steep interest rates on their remaining balance.
Millions of people are so deeply in debt that they may remain indebted for life. The official national debt, the product of years of fiscal deficits, now totals $8.5 trillion—some $64,000 per taxpayer. (See data atwww.earthpolicy.org/Updates/nadministration)
In 2008, this figure is projected to reach a staggering $9.4 trillion. We are digging a fiscal black hole and sinking deeper and deeper into it. Each month the Treasury covers the fiscal deficit by auctioning off securities.
The two leading international buyers of U.S. Treasury securities are Japan and China. In this role, China is now also becoming our banker. This developing country, where income levels are one sixth those of the United States, is financing the excesses of an affluent industrial society.
What’s wrong with this picture? In times past, when our fiscal deficits were covered largely by U.S. lenders, interest payments on the debt were reinvested in the United States. Now they are flowing abroad to Japan, China, and other foreign holders of U.S. debt.
While the U.S. fiscal deficit, driven partly by the war in Iraq, soars to stratospheric levels, the country is facing an unprecedented fiscal challenge as the baby boomer generation retires, pushing up the costs of social security, Medicaid, and Medicare.
This, combined with the growing interest payments on our debt to China and other countries, will put a nearly impossible tax burden on the next generation—something for which they may never forgive us.
The U.S. trade deficit is growing by leaps and bounds, nearly doubling from $452 billion in 2000 to an estimated $850 billion in 2006. Rising oil imports and the trade deficit with China account for over half of it.
National policy failures such as not adequately supporting the use of renewable energy technologies have contributed to the growing U.S. trade deficit. For example, the United States should be a leading manufacturer and exporter of solar cells and wind turbines, but it has fallen behind both Europe and Japan.
The solar cell, invented at Bell Labs in 1954, is an American technology.
Although the modern wind industry wasborn in California at the beginning of the 1980s, the U.S. failure tosustain support for wind resource development allowed European countries tolargely take over this industry.
Even though rising oil imports are widening our trade deficit, we consumeoil with abandon, weakening the economy and undermining our politicalindependence.We have lost influence in world financial markets simply because of ourmounting debt, much of it held by other countries.
If China’s leaders everbecome convinced that the dollar is headed continuously downward and they decide to dump their dollar holdings, the dollar could collapse.
Beholden to other countries for oil and to finance our debt, the UnitedStates is fast losing its leadership role in the world. The question we arefacing is not simply whether our Christmas is made in China, but morefundamentally whether we can restore the discipline and values that made usa great nation—a nation the world admired, respected, and emulated.
This is not something that Santa Claus can deliver, not even a Chinese Santa Claus.
This is something only we can do.